Archive for the ‘language & literature’ Category

In response to: Letter to the Editor…

thanks heaps mate! great review – however I have just made some slight adjustments to the published version.

Mother fucker, I was just being polite, I didn’t actually want you to edit me and my socio-economic judgments! Damn, I feel so oppressed right now…

Ha. Neg, I knew it was coming, Chris is still a guru.



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Isn’t it interesting that we can use something as simple as birthday wishes to measure the difference in the way society communicates today, to say ten or fifty years ago? In 1961, on your 21st birthday you would’ve received an abundance of hand-written cards (as well as a few dollars and a plethora of drugs in all likeliness). In 2001 it would no doubt have been a mixture of cards and texts but now everything goes down online.

As it stands I have received 204 facebook birthday wishes (yeh I’m a dick and I counted them (and not just so I could post it on here to add to my post substantiality), just because I’m a dick). Compare that to the 25 text messages (a nice personal touch, thank you kindly to those who did) and only 12 cards, one of which was from my federal member of parliament Jamie Briggs; congratulations on earning my vote for the next election with that move buddy.

Now I’m not trying to view this change in communication medium pessimistically (except for maybe the loss of the art of writing a birthday card and the meaning and symbolism behind it), I’m just observing how fascinating it is that so much of our world is lived through a 13″ laptop screen. People aren’t afraid to be a product of this generation and it’s making communicating ever quicker and easier but I don’t think anything will ever be able to replace the warm feeling you get when you tear open an envelope and find a nicely written message from a family member of friend. Pure delight.

mmmmm computer cake. steak sauce.

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A couple of months ago I applied for an internship at Spook magazine in Melbourne. Unfortunately I was unsuccessful in procuring the job but I was fortunate enough to make it through a few of the screening processes, receive an interview with the editor and get a nice trip to Melbourne out of it so all was not lost. I had the opportunity to write a few pieces during the application process so I thought I would share those here.

The first piece of work that they required for the internship was an application/cv; unsure exactly what I was supposed to include in it I came up with this.

Check out the application/cv: Spook Intern Application

I guess they liked it, or maybe it was just marginally better than the other applications they received and they were subsequently left with no choice but to handball me through but anyway, with the initial application a distant memory (of like three days) Spook asked me (and the other applicants who passed the first screening) to produce a piece based on one of three categories. I can’t remember what they were but I chose to interview the nice folk down at Treadly; the bike store on Ebenezer Plc. and despite my expectations, or lack thereof, the crew at Spook liked it.

Scope the interview: ‘Treading Lightly’ 

Alex and I went down to the store on a balmy summer night and took a few freelance shots to accompany the interview and about two weeks later I was on a flight to the V.I.C…

It’s safe to say the magazine hasn’t crumbled without my presence (I’m not sure whether I would have liked it to or not, after all it is my favourite magazine) and their website/blog activity has continued to grow over 2011 so keep an eye out for their next issue when it hits shelves this Winter.

Try not to enjoy it too much though, the ass holes did cut me after all…


Have a gander at Spook’s blog here if you’re still bored…

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I was busy searching the shelves of Title for birthday presents (for myself, sweet) when I stumbled across this divine little treasure. Minimalism; it’s a fantastic concept but I thought the fact that they had attempted to condense it into a book and came up with a 1,000 page, two-inch thick novel to be quite ironic. Obviously the authors don’t believe in what they are writing or they wouldn’t have created “a comprehensive and thoroughgoing summary” containing “more than 2,000 colour and black & white photographs“. Take a leaf out of your own book and I might be interested in what you have to say.

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It was with great reluctance that Damir Metljak, long-time friend of the site, agreed to write an exclusive piece for ‘the city of lost children’ but after reading his latest masterpiece (I’ve come to the conclusion that this is the only way to describe his work justly) I can do nothing but humbly thank the man for allowing this site to host such beautifully and thoughtfully constructed articulations. It is a rare and handsome talent to be admired.

Why thinking smothers the onset of being labelled a ‘rapey stalker’.


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Have you ever watched a movie like Shutter Island, where one of the characters is so trapped within their own mind that they are completely delusional about their environment and relationships? …And then wondered whether or not You are Leo? Sat there and thought; “Holy shit. Maybe my entire reality is a fabrication of my insane, delusional cortex. Maybe I am actually nothing like the image I have created of myself inside my head. Maybe I’m a complete burden on all those around me (well, even more of one). Maybe my life is an absolute mess and I am utterly unaware.”

It’s a haunting and humbling feeling because really, what is actually stopping it from being true? Any one of us could be living in an entirely different world to what everybody around us is and not know a thing about it. Our mind could be protecting us from the harsh realities we couldn’t otherwise confront.

Or maybe everything is as it seems and I can breathe a sigh of relief as I fall asleep watching The Sopranos tonight… Ahhhhh ignorance really is bliss.

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It’s Monday evening and Carmelina sends me a text. “Sooo are you free tonight? xx” (I’m not sure how many o’s were actually in ‘so’ but you get the gist)

Stock standard structure of an S.Day reply goes a little something like this:

1. Begin text with cheerful greeting so recipient is immediately receiving a positive response (i.e. Heyy, Yo, Hey you (emoticons and double consonant use optional)).

2. Ask a question to generate more positivity from the recipient. Asking them a question demonstrates that you do care about them (easy q’s: how was your weekend? / how was the wedding, did they have good food?). Fuck. It’s simple, right?

3. Politely shut them down.

4. Suggest ‘perhaps another time’ to re-inspire their hope but ensure you give a rough time-frame so that a) they are working on your terms, b) they forget about the negativity in point 3 and c) if you can’t be fucked later you’re really not accountable… (sorry Carmelina)

Now after this sequence of dot points (it summated to like a three sentence text, well within the basic 25c structure of a standard text message) was sent, Carmelina dutifully replied; answering my questions and making a note to take me up on the ‘later-time offer’. [“Just let me know! xx” – see 4a, brilliant]


This particular Monday the reason she had text me was to go see her friend play a small-scale set at the Crown & Anchor. **Note: Dimensions of text conversation instantly changed upon discovery of set, again sorry Carmelina…**

Her friend’s name is Jayne West and from all reports (Carmelina’s basic critical analysis as well as a short Rip It Up/DB piece) she’s worth seeing live. It seems that both local publications and Carmelina were correct in their examination of Jayne’s live show because I (and Damir, I dragged him along so I didn’t have to go Derulo) was blown away. Her raw and beautiful Sarah Blasko/ Lisa Mitchell-esque originals and awkwardly charismatic and hilarious on-stage banter gelled into what was one of the best low-key shows I’ve seen in a long time.

She is definitely a talent to watch and with so much untamed grandeur in her voice and a gorgeous stage presence she has the potential to really take the Australian music scene by storm. I haven’t asked permission to put a track up on here (she sells EP’s for $10, I bought one so deal with my sharing exploits Ms. West) so grab it while you can before she becomes world famous and I get the pants sued off of me for illegally posting music.

Peace x

Jayne West – Back To You

For more info on Jayne, scope out her website here.

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